We all want to board the ever intriguing and adventurous ship of relation, but some of us do not know how or when to take that first step. We worry about being mature enough or even how to approach a dating relationship. Some say that age or maturity is irrelevant, but I find it completely relevant. I believe that once a person has grasped the concept of the love and compassion that Jesus has for us and lives that out through their own life, they will have a successful serious relationship. That is the honest truth. This fact is not intended to intimidate, but rather an action that we must apply to our lives, because not only will it improve dating relationships, it will benefit your life and all who are in it.
GIVING AND TAKING
Dating, just like any other part of our lives, must be treated with care and be kept and tended to. And when consistently taken care of, the couple will reap the fruits of healthy relating. It takes giving and receiving to have a flourishing relationship. If you can receive well, and give better, you will undoubtedly be blessed with an incredible someone by your side.
KNOW YOURSELF
Knowing yourself is important in dating. Knowing what you want or need paired with a selfless attitude is the key. Dating and marriage are beautiful partnerships that God intended to reflect the church and our relationship with Him. We constantly struggle to know what we should do. The battle lines are clearly drawn between what we need for a healthy relationship and what we want for gratifying our desires.
Never fear a relationship because you are unsure it will work out. If all seems well until some discomfort sets in, that simply means you both must take a step back and examine the problem in good faith then take a few steps toward coming back together even stronger and more supportive than before. In other words, talk it out. Reveal what you are feeling, pretending is the worst option. We all love a good actor on screen to give a magnificent representation of a character, but in real life, well, we want truth and acting will actually get us farther away from what we need.
THE IMPORTANCE OF COMMUNICATION
Talking seems like one of those “duh” moments, but it is difficult somehow to just say what is on your mind and heart. That is where knowing yourself and how you feel is very vital. Have an intentional face-to-face meeting where honesty is all that is spoken, because otherwise nothing will be resolved. You cannot solve a puzzle unless you have all the pieces. I will end with few principles from John Wooden, a man who knew how human life needs to be lived in order to be successful, especially in relationships. These may seem more directed toward life but are in fact the keys to beginning a healthy relationship. Be true to yourself. Help others. Build a shelter against a rainy day by the life you live. Pray for guidance and counsel and give thanks for your blessings each day.
