Standards, schmandards. Live and let live. No need to be hyper-conservative.
Like it or not, Biola, this is my read of our attitude toward modesty. Lest you think this is another modest-is-hottest article, keep reading: This is about you.
Did you know you have a responsibility to enforce a modesty standard? Since you signed the community standards agreement when you applied to Biola, that shouldn’t be news. According to Matthew Hooper, associate dean of students, you agreed to uphold all of Biola’s behavioral standards when you signed that paper. These include the modesty standard, as it appears in the Student Handbook.
The standard explains its intent and lists clothes that are inappropriate. The clause that caught my eye was this: “These standards will be enforced by all members of the community.” The text goes on to call it “our responsibility to hold one another accountable.” We have a responsibility to each other – to the community – to uphold the modesty standard.
Please don’t hear me saying we ought to run around self-righteously shaming our immodest brothers and sisters. The spirit of the standard – indeed, the spirit of Biola – is one of biblical community. We are a body of believers, and we ought to help each other live as Christ lived. This is a matter of love, not law. It is not loving of me to dress immodestly, and it is not loving of my friends to let me do so. Accountability with grace is difficult, but it is supremely necessary.
Now, you don’t have to put on Roxanne’s red dress to violate the standard. As with most vices, immodesty is often subtle. It can be a simple pair of short shorts, a low-cut shirt, or undergarments peeking out from your jeans or blouse. All of those items are labeled inappropriate, but they are prevalent on campus.
When I see a girl dressed indecently, my typical reaction is to think judgmental thoughts and go on with my life. I sometimes think about the men she encounters who might stumble.
My reaction falls short. First, in judging her I am sinning (I don’t tend toward a virtuous kind of judgment, but a wickedly motivated one). Second, in thinking only of the men she meets, I neglect the women who will compare their bodies to hers and struggle. Moreover, I neglect that her dress may be a surface-level indicator of her own deeper troubles. Finally, I’m wrong to go on with life. After all, I am obligated to enforce a modesty standard.
If you’re on faculty or staff, you’re not off the hook. You need to lead by example in this. Hooper said it’s your responsibility to help us uphold this standard. By holding us accountable, you can show us how to love each other and respect our community. I can’t count the number of classes I’ve sat through with provocatively dressed peers of both genders. It happens all the time. Yet I can’t name one professor who has ever said a word about it. If they have, it has been to no avail; the same students dress the same way week after week.
I had a youth pastor who summed it up plainly: “Guys lust. Girls lust to be lusted.” We may not think in these blunt terms, but it’s true that men are prone to lust and women are prone to desire the attention. It’s our job to love each other out of this sinful cycle, not to condemn those who are stuck in it. That’s the spirit of the standard. If you really love each other, you’ll tell another when they look sexy – and that it’s doing a disservice to them and their community.
