Written by Avina Khiatani

At the beginning of the semester, I feel like this is my first time at Biola, for the sixth time. This place is strangely familiar, yet so far from what I call home.

Thousands of miles away lies a tiny little island off the coast of China, a city called Hong Kong where I was born and raised, until I somehow ended up in a Christian school in Southern California.

I have to say that I’ve grown to love it here. To those back home, I describe Biola as the ultimate “la-la land”. Everybody smiles and waves at each other, even if they’ve only met once and can’t remember their names. The smells from the cafe every time I walk past, praying in class, chapel services…

And in those moments, the world feels right and in it’s place as I walk along, to class, or “read” at the fountain, but get absolutely nothing done.

Yet, I can’t say that I completely fit in, even years after being here.

Sometimes, though, I wonder if we need to completely fit in.

For those of you who haven’t heard much about Hong Kong, it is an extremely diverse place. Speaking of diverse, I myself am not Chinese, as my parents happen to be from the ever-awesome country of India.

I’ve never been to India, and the only Hindi words I know are the ones for love and marriage, thanks to Bollywood.

Being from a melting pot of cultures, I grew up not really knowing who I am, or what country with which to associate myself.

Most of my closest friends were Chinese, and I speak Chinese, but I don’t look like it. So, I don’t know that I will ever understand what it feels like to really be Chinese, because people don’t treat me like I am.

You could say I grew up with a “wannabe” culture. Everywhere I go, I adapt, and I’d like to think I’m not so bad at it.

I speak perfect English, which I like to tell people I learned from watching “Sesame Street.” I have an American accent, for some unknown reason. I have always loved American film, literature and music. Coming here, I thought I’d feel instantly at home.

But there is no way to adapt to this completely.

Every time I return from break, I have to deal with feeling bitter, lonely and left out all over again.

Parts of me still run on Chinese and Indian values. I had no idea this was the case until I came to Biola and compared myself with my friends here. And sometimes it’s hard for me to understand how one culture isn’t necessarily better than another, and that it’s okay to be the person I’ve been brought up to be.
The amazing thing is that even though my situation can hurt, and be so awkward sometimes, it’s incredibly beautiful learning about other people, and learning about myself. It’s beautiful when I see people of completely different backgrounds and cultures come together as one body in Christ

Even as I write this, I can’t contain myself thinking about the immense joy He must feel when He sees people intentionally worship together, live together, serve together, grow together, and love together.

In those moments, when I sit down to remember the beauty of His creation, and His promises of oneness, I know that the world is right, and I’m confident that everything is in place.