Bastions of musical integrity Nickelback have failed to catch a hint. With countless anti-Nickelback Facebook pages and an entire website dedicated to how terrible the band is, they just will not stop. Chad Kroeger and Co. have been churning out shiny overproduced “rock” tunes since 1996, riddled with tasteless profanities, sexist content and a sound more reminiscent of white noise than actual music. The band has now burdened the world with yet another album, inexplicably titled “No New Address.”

The album’s opener “Million Miles An Hour” is all the evidence anyone needs that absolutely nothing about Nickelback has changed since 1996. The band appears completely incapable of taking risks, maturing musically or putting an ounce of passion into anything they do. They continue to play the same sounding riffs in the same verse, chorus, verse, chorus structure. Just to ensure the all around dreadfulness of this release, Nickelback, or rather their record label UMG Recordings, decided to pair the band with hip hop artist Flo Rida. Flo Rida adds a rapped verse towards the end of the track, and I cannot help but ask one question: Why? 

I tried my best. I tried to be the courageous journalist all of my readers expect me to be, but I just could not do it. I could not get past the halfway point of this album. It insulted my intelligence, and it felt quite immoral to contribute the one cent for an album play on Spotify. Let us all finally lift up with one voice and ask Nickelback once and for all: Please, for the love of all that is good, stop.